King Arthur (2 out of 4 stars)

I avoided this film, despite subject matter that would normally draw me to it. The reviews were generally weak, and none of the names connected with the film gave any indication that my opinion would transcend what the critics were saying. Antoine Fuqua is known more for his city streets and cops. A medieval epic seemed like a reach. Anyway, I wanted a brainless show for a lazy evening, so I grabbed the DVD the wife had acquired and popped it into the player.

It’s a good thing life still can surprise just a bit.



While King Arthur was no masterpiece, it was a decent diversion. Clive Owen is Arthur. Arthur in this case is Arturius, a Roman officer assigned to the distant British garrison of the Roman empire. His knights aren’t Brits. They’re Semites who were “forced” to serve the Romans as cavalry as a result of a defeat on the battlefield in ages past. The story takes place on the day the Romans have decided to leave Britain, leaving it to the native Woads and the invading Saxons from the north. Merlin’s the Woad leader. Nope, no magic.

I have no idea if this is based on any real truth. It can’t be any less true than the Mallory Arthurian legends, and there’s never anything wrong with a good yarn. Turn off your “that’s bullshit” detector and enjoy the ride.

There isn’t enough time to develop all the characters, so chummy banter has to do. Bors gets all the good lines, and has some degree of backstory across the length of the film. Lancelot gets the voiceover point of view and gets to open and end the film, but doesn’t get much in between. Gawain, Galahad, Tristran and the “was he really a knight of the round table” guy that no one knows get short shrift. They all get decent action segments though. Merlin gets five minutes of screen time and doesn’t do anything of note. Guenivere is played by the usually smoking hot Keira Knightley, but she’s wasted in this film. Not a lot of screen time, a dozen lines, and they didn’t let her use her natural accent. Bleh. And for the fans – sorry, not a lot of Keira skin. There a brief, darkly-lit forgettable sex scene. Her ridiculous outfit for the final battle looks like a reject from a French fall collection. My reaction – she’s going to fight in THAT?

Clive Owen is really wooden in this film. I guess I need to see Closer for a better performance. But the worst person in this film is the usually decent Stellan Skarsgaard, who plays the Saxon leader. He’s talking like a refugee from the Sly Stallone school of enunciation. I don’t see how a charismatic leader of a great army can mumble like he’s got a mouthful of marbles all the time.

The action scenes are ok, nothing to write home about. They’re certainly not good enough to recommend the film on just their strength. You’ve seen better in Braveheart and The Lord of the Rings and even Troy. Fuqua is really much better in close quarters; the single battles were much better than the mass melees. The editing was a mess; the film as a whole felt jerky and laced continuity and pacing. It didn’t flow too well.

Couldn’t they have come up with a better title than “King Arthur”?

Bottom line – ok as a rental or as a bargain bin buy. You’ll watch it once, say “that wasn’t so bad” and forget it.